How Long Should Your Engagement Last?

From the moment your partner gets down on one knee to ask that burning question, you are filled with an overwhelming amount of joy and excitement. However, many couples soon feel a wave of stress and anxiety as the realization of wedding planning sinks in. Your friends here at Conklyn’s Weddings are thrilled to tell you that there is no need to panic or experience sleepless nights during your engagement. Instead, enjoy being engaged and bask in the romance and glory of being a fiancé. While some couples cannot wait to say, “I do,” others have a nice, leisurely time planning their big day for over a year and a half or longer. So, is it better to hit the ground running and have a short engagement or take your time and savor a long one?

Short Engagement

On one end, shortening your engagement to nine months or less comes with its benefits and challenges. From efficiently planning and getting into a flow, to confirming your desired date with available vendors, a short engagement is both a whirlwind of excitement and stress. However, if this sounds intimidating, take a closer look at the pros and cons before making any decisions.

Engaged couple taking a photo and pointing to ring

Pros of a Short Engagement

If making decisions or choosing vendors from a long list sounds daunting, booking the best vendor based on a shorter list of those that have flexible availability might work in your favor. As you efficiently and quickly plan and confirm each detail of your wedding day, you will soon get into a nice productive rhythm. This state of flow is sure to make the process of wedding planning painless and seamless as you confidently make choices without having the time to second guess. Finally, what can be better than calling yourself Mr. or Mrs. even sooner?

Couple writing in wedding calendar and wedding planner

Cons of a Short Engagement

After reviewing the advantages of shortening your engagement, you may already be piecing together the disadvantages. Of course, if you have your heart set on certain vendors, like a venue, caterer, photographer, etc. you may have to work around their availability and existing commitments. As everything moves at lightning speed during a short engagement, securing your “dream team” may be a challenge. Working on a short timeline also means that your guests have less time to plan their attendance. As soon as you set a date, it is vital that the most important people on your guest list receive a “save the date” so they can start planning immediately, too.

Long Engagement

The majority of couples find themselves engaged for an average of 13 months before their big day. For many people, this may seem like the perfect amount of time to plan their dream wedding, while others prefer an even longer engagement, perhaps over 16 -24 months. With a greater amount of time, you certainly have the flexibility to secure your favorite vendors. However, with so much time on your hands, you may find yourself changing your mind, especially if next year’s trends have yet to be unveiled.

Couple on a date night

Pros of a Long Engagement

In addition to planning your wedding at a relaxing and slow pace, a long engagement also presents the opportunity to enjoy spending quality time with your fiancé as you patiently await your big day. Another big attraction to a long engagement is the ability to hand-select your team of vendors based on your personal preferences rather than their availability. This warrants a greater chance of booking your dream venue on your date of choice, the perfect attire, a trusted beauty team, the most sought-after caterer, and your dream photographer.  In addition, securing your vendors over a year or two prior to your wedding may result in saving a bit of money as the demand is lower.

Wedding date on calendar with gold wedding rings

Cons of a Long Engagement 

With any bright side of things comes a downside, however small. If waiting a few extra months or years to marry the love of your life results in too much anticipation, you might feel overwhelmingly impatient and anxious counting down the days until you officially tie the knot. Some engaged couples truly cannot wait! Another thing to keep in mind, if you love keeping up with the latest fashion and styles, is that your favorite wedding look or color palette may evolve over your engagement. Some couples find themselves second-guessing their choices, making changes to their themes, and even reworking new trends into their existing wedding designs.

Regardless of your desired timeline, the precious moments you have as a fiancé should be savored and enjoyed. As you plan this important celebration of love, we suggest finding a happy medium between a long and short engagement. While waiting years to tie the knot and potentially losing momentum on wedding planning seems less than ideal, you also want to ensure you can secure your favorite vendors, like Conklyn’s Weddings, and secure each detail of your day in a calm manner.